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A Quality That Creates a Positive Life – Courtesy

Common Courtesy; It’s not so common anymore

What has happened to common courtesy?

What has happened to treating people with respect & dignity?

Recently, a friend asked if I would speak to an acquaintance of theirs who was struggling with “finding herself”. She said she thought I was a good listener and because I had helped her in the past she thought I was a perfect fit for her friend. So I connected with her friend. She was a single mom working a job she didn’t like to make ends meet in order to take care of her family until she could “find a job in her original field of work”. I really got a sense that the field of work was not her “sweet spot” – wasn’t what made her heart sing. So after listening to her for a while, I asked her if she could do the one thing that would make her excited to get up and go to work each morning what would it be? Well this question launched quite a conversation between us with her revealing so much that was heavy on her heart. Unfortunately it was getting late and we couldn’t continue the conversation. With both of us having children to prepare for the next day, we made plans to get together early in the week.

She texted me on Monday, sharing how much she enjoyed our conversation with me and was excited about the plan to meet on Tuesday. Since she lives considerably away from me we endeavored to find a mutually accessible place for both us between both of our locations. She asked if I didn’t mind doing the” due diligence” of finding a place & getting the hours of operation etc. I didn’t mind since I had the more flexible schedule. After searching online, I conveyed to her that the location chosen unfortunately closed earlier than we were able to meet. She was apologetic but said she still wanted to meet (all this is happening via text mind you) and when she was finished with her meeting and got home, she would do some research and call me with the new plans.

That call never came. I sent her a text. No response. I called – went to voice mail. So I shrugged it off, called my friend – who apologized profusely for this person’s behavior. I assured her it was okay and wasn’t her fault.

Funny thing is, when I got off the phone with my friend, I began to really think about what happened and I began to get really pissed off!

What was wrong with people?

What has happened to calling to cancel plans or explain why you are late?

It wasn’t necessarily this person that ticked me off – it was the final straw in a long line of incidents where I encountered people who were down right disrespectful and cavalier with their irresponsible behavior, then had the audacity to act entitled to the thought that it was acceptable behavior to act like that!


I was raised in the generation where please and thank you were the rule rather than the exception.

Where you responded “yes ma’am or no ma’am, yes sir or no sir” not yeah or what. ( I did the latter once to my mother – my head still rings just thinking about it!).

Where if you were a male (young or old) you held the door open for women & the elderly.

Where men got up to give all women, pregnant or not, & the elderly a seat on a crowded train or bus.

Where men removed their hats when they entered a building – especially a church, court or school.

Where, when you shook hands, you looked the person in the eye and said pleased/pleasure to meet you.

Where you called to say you were unable to keep an appointment & apologized for the inconvenience.

Funny thing is during our conversation, she expressed her outrage about the very same subject – but as it pertained to employers.

Used to be employers would have Human Resources contact you via phone or letter to let you know that you did not get the particular position you applied for. Nowadays, you’ll wait until the cows come home or finally break down and call them where they tell you unapologetically that the position has been filled. Then about 3 months later you get the letter/email that you didn’t get the job!!

Isn’t that kind of what she did to me?

We are a society that demands respect – from everyone. But today’s generations are growing up entitled, enabled ignorant and rude of common simple courtesies. Demanding to be treated with courtesy & respect but not giving any.

That being said, would you be willing to join me in a little experiment?

Let’s try for the next 30 days (it is said that it takes that long to create a new habit) to return to the “good-ole days” and perform common courtesies each and every day!

Let’s open doors and offer seats. Let’s say please and thank you.

For those of us with young children, if we have been lax in enforcing these behaviors, let’s teach & reinforce these behaviors in of common courtesies our sweet kiddos.

Trust me, the end result will be amazing.

I am the mother of two daughters; ages 16 and 11. My youngest has Down Syndrome. I have raised them in the ways of “common courtesies”, just like my mother did for me and my siblings. Let me tell you I get compliments all the time on both of their behaviors!

It only takes a small pebble to create great & long lasting ripples in a lake… So lets pay it forward

Let’s be the change we want to see in the world. The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.

Let’s start today.


Frustrated with rude and disrespectful people? In this article I share my “take-aways” on this and how I think we can effect a change.

Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Chondra_M_Babb/1945299

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8612787